Merry Christmas

More Season's Eatings.

Breakfast:

1. Chocolate cake

2. More chocolate cake

Lunch:

1. Turkey sandwiches

2. Honeyroasted gammon sandwiches

Tea:

1.More more chocolate cake

Dinner:

1. Turkey and Gammon pie

2. Roast potatoes with rosemary

3. Moremoremore chocolate cake

Supper:

1. Even more chocolate cake

Season's Eatings.

breakfast:
1. Mince pies
2. Raspberry smoothie
3. Toast

mid-morning snack:
1. 1 slice of Christmas cake
2. 1 slice of mango

lunch:
1. Noodle soup made from leftover roast turkey and assorted vegetables
2. Half a bratwurst
3. 1 square of mint chocolate

tea:
1. More mince pies
2. Another piece of christmas cake
3. Handful of assorted fancy nuts
4. What the heck, I'll have a bit of chocolate sponge as well

dinner:
1. Vietnamese-style duck rolls
2. Cucumber & carrot sticks in onion dip
3. Salmon and dill cream on crackers
4. Lightly seared salmon salad
5. More bratwurst
6. Roast potato medley
7. Turkey with cranberry sauce
8. Honey-glazed ham with gravy
9. Macadamia nut mudpie
10. Soursop sorbet

supper:
1. Beef udon in soup
2. Mango & crabmeat sushi rolls

GRRRR

When the baby is sleeping, and you are a guest who has just 'dropped by', you do NOT:-
1. Slam doors (especially the door to the nursery)
2. Shout loudly at the sleeping baby 'OH, HE IS SLEEPING'
3. Wonder why the baby is now crying.

Christmas is here

Friday: Dinner Party
Saturday: Lunch Party and Dinner Party
Sunday: Dinner Party
Monday: Dinner Party
Tuesday: Lunch and Dinner Party
Wednesday: Christmas Eve Dinner Party
Thursday: Christmas Day Party
Friday: Boxing Day Party
Saturday: Post Boxing Day Party
Sunday: Tea Party
Monday: TSCD cries and passes out from exhaustion

Willpower

Today, I have resisted purchasing a Christmas themed onesie (red and white with reindeer antlers on the hood) which was cute beyond all imagining.

I should get a prize.

Party tricks

Month 0: Producing odourless baby poop in prodigious quantities

Month 1: Acting as a urinary geyser

Month 2: Falling asleep on cue during the 'Sense of Six' leitmotif

Month 3: Laughing at...nothing

Month 4: Cramming both fists into the mouth and smiling

Month 5: Cramming both feet into the mouth and smiling

Month 6: Blowing drool bubbles and laughing

Month 7: Waving 'goodbye' at people (including inanimate people - portraits, photographs and store mannikins)

Month 8: Pulling to stand so as to reach the piano keyboard and play avant garde jazz

Month 9: Clapping hands to 'good' music, yelling indignantly at 'bad' music

Month 10: Using toes to scratch forehead (don't ask me how he does this - it all looks very wrong)

How old am I?!

Sometimes, moving back in with the Aged Ps is not really all that fun.

Discipline (I)

It's a languid afternoon by the pool. The air is heavy around me, saturated. MDH is splashing around with Stardust in the children's paddle pool, and I am relaxing on a bench listening to the shrilling of the cicadas.

Beside me is a Posh Mama. I know she's posh because she is wearing tinted sunglasses, talking to me about postnatal pilates and smells like a summer evening. I have no idea why she's talking to me, seeing as I appear to be wearing damp rags, my hair is hanging limply in straggling wet clumps and I smell faintly of chlorine. I am looking enviously at her pedicure. Why is she at the public pool? Don't people of her calibre hang out at swimming clubs?

Running alongside the far end of the adult's pool is her 3 year old son, wearing a blue wetsuit and matching shoes. He's a very bonny little fellow, with sun-bleached golden hair and fair grey eyes. My heart skips a beat as I watch him leaning over the deep end, trying to reach a leaf that has fallen into the water.

Posh Mama calls out, "Don't play there, darling. It's slippery and you might fall in. Come over here!" The golden-haired child throws her a big grin and resumes his pool cleaning duties.

Posh Mama sighs and shakes her head. "He's so active nowadays; I can't control him...HEY! Stop that right now! Put your shoes back on!"

I watch as her son takes off his shoes, hangs over the side of the pool and starts to use them to scoop up the leaf which floats further and further away. Unsuccessful, he screams and flings them at the head of a passing swimmer. Bullseye!

Posh Mama retrives his shoes, apologises to the swimmer and chastises her son. She returns to the bench where I am sitting whilst her boy continues his perambulations around the deep end of the pool.

Meanwhile, I am looking at Stardust and wondering...

What would you have done?

Recommendations?

I want to watch an anime series. Any recommendations?

Conversation

MDH: Eat your dinner Stardust! Om nom nom nom.
SD: Meh. (purses lips and looks away)
MDH: Om nom nom nom!!
SD: Meh. (purses lips and shakes head)
MDH: Come on!!!!
SD: (takes half a mouthful of food and...) Brrrrrrrrrrrr!
MDH: AAaaaaaaa food is flying everywhere!
SD: (smears food on face and hair)
MDH: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA So messy!!!
SD: Heh heh heh heh!
MDH: No! Messy! Yuck!
SD: (smiles and points at MDH) Da-da?

(silence)

MDH: Our son is the Best in the World!!!

My boys

Shhhhh...they're sleeping.

Thoughts

Which would be a greater regret?
1. Putting my career aside and giving up financial independance
2. Putting Stardust aside and giving up being his main caregiver

Which is a greater worry?
1. Financial burden
2. Family dysfunction

Packing for a 3 week jaunt

Stardust's luggage:
1. 20 pieces of flat white nappies
2. 12 pairs daytime cloth nappies
3. 10 washcloths
4. 6 bodysuits
5. 6 long sleeved tee shirts
6. 6 pairs of socks
7. 4 feeding spoons
8. 3 waterproof nappy covers
9. 3 pairs of overnight cloth nappies
10. 3 sleepsuits
11. 3 long trousers
12. 2 jumpers
13. 2 beanie hats
14. 2 sun hats
15. 2 blankets
16. 2 hooded towels
17. 1 cotsheet
18. 1 sleeping sack
19. 1 swim nappy
20. 1 swimsuit
21. Baby toiletries: shampoo, bath soap, moisturiser, sunblock, mosquito repellent, nappy rash cream, nappy liners, baby wipes, panadol, hairbrush, nail scissors, wetbag.
22. Handheld food-processor
23. Baby bottles and teats
24. Breastpump
25. Travel cot
26. Toys toys toys toys
27. Stroller

My luggage:
1. 4 sets undergarments
2.4 pairs socks
3. 3 teeshirts
4. 2 pairs trousers
5. 1 jumper
6. 1 swimsuit
7. 1 pair of slippers
8. 1 jacket
9. 1 pair of sunglasses
10. My toiletries: Toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush, facial wash, nailclippers

Left at home:
1. MDH
2. Kitchen Sink

Breastfeeding makes you dumb!

Month 0-3: Battlestar Galactica Seasons 1-3
Month 3-7: Gilmore Girls Seasons 1-7
Month 8-9: Hannah Montana Seasons 1-2
Month 10: Button Moon

It seems that the longer I breastfeed, the lower my IQ appears to get. Maybe it gets drained out in the breastmilk. Well, it better be going somewhere!

(Actually, I started to get more aware of the quality of television programming as Stardust got older. I really didn't want Stardust's first words to be "Frak those frakking cylons!")

Medical Grand Rounds 5:12

This week's Grand Rounds are hosted by Sharp Brain who has brilliantly organised posts into a question-answer format. My favourites this week are an interview with Santa and an insightful post by Emergiblog on current hospital attitudes.

Facebook game

From Mr Brown

Rules:
1. Grab the book nearest you. Right now.
2. Turn to page 57.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post that sentence along with these instructions in a note to your wall, and post your sentence in a comment here as well. Include the title of book and author.

My book:
"Start on the left and name each object that has been placed in the row."
- from Fun Start by June Oberlander

Hold my hand

Hold my hand.
Be safe. Be comforted. Be loved.
Learn to hold hands.
Keep safe. Comfort others. Love.

10 conversation stoppers in 10 months

Month 0:
'So now you are having your confinement - have you been eating chicken testicles?'

Month 1:
'Your son is so pretty, your next baby will definitely be a girl!'

Month 2:
'Why do you read your baby those silly books about hungry caterpillars? My friend read her baby 'The Economist' and now she is so clever!'

Month 3:
'Your baby is so cute! Looks like a dog!'

Month 4:
'You haven't registered Stardust for kindergarten yet? WHY NOT?! Don't you want him to be clever?'

Month 5:
'Eh, my daughter-in-law is going to give birth soon - do you recommend chicken testicles?'

Month 6:
'When your baby is teething you should let him bite your finger.'

Month 7:
'You shouldn't let your baby stand up so early or he'll have bad eyesight.'

Month 8:
'Let your baby watch more TV, then he can learn about the world!'

Month 9:
'I can tell that you are breastfeeding - you seem to be balding.'

Month 10:
'You really shouldn't put blusher on your baby's face.'

10 months

Wow, has it been that long since I updated my site?!

I'm sorry to those who attempted to contact me in this time - I didn't intend to ignore you at all (just didn't check my email!). I've been rather preoccupied with my new status as Stardust's Mom. I've been very happy.

To make up for it, I will post everyday until Christmas!