Taking Stock

Private, Bull Keep Out
Originally uploaded by Sunshine follows me.

So, here are some photos that I think sum up 2005 for me.

Most of this year was spent pushing past my boundaries and into unexplored territory. I guess you could say that I have lived outside of my comfort zone.

As a sociable city girl, I've lived quite happily amongst skyscrapers and convenience stores, and I am used to having a constant supply of visitors trooping through my living room, keeping the place bubbling with friendly chatter.

I now understand the meaning of Fresh Air and Solitude. I also understand the meaning of the sign 'Private. Bull Keep Out' and I now know that it is not a warning sign for all passing Bulls, but for all people who do not fancy meeting a passing Bull.

Flotsam
Originally uploaded by Sunshine follows me.

This year, I have been drifting from town to town, from job to job, forever filling out endless application forms to ensure another training contract. It's difficult, not being able to settle down in one spot for more than a few months at a time.

I would love to stop paying rent and start paying a mortgage instead, and be in a place where I could paint the walls any colour I wanted (Duck's Egg Blue, Burnt Sienna, Sunflower Yellow, oh, anything except Magnolia) and put up pictures with nails instead of blu-tack.

Somehow, even with all the stressors of my job and the with the instability of my lifestyle, I have managed to keep afloat (and I know that it is not of my own strength that I do so - I'm generally a pretty poor swimmer in rough waters). For this, I thank God for looking after me and for keeping my soul buoyant.

Whose life was the sea
Originally uploaded by Sunshine follows me.

I have also worked very hard at being a better, more confident doctor and having a better bedside manner.

I try to see my patients from different perspectives and I want to be able treat them as individuals and make them feel in control. This is very difficult. It's hard not to sound condescending (It's hard to say 'Do you understand?' in a way that doesn't sound patronising).

I don't want them to see me as a young girl. I want them to see me as a doctor who cares, someone whom they can trust, someone whom they can tell their secrets to, someone who is trying to help. I'm not entirely there yet, but I'm getting there.

At least, more of my patients call me 'Doctor' instead of 'Nurse', now.

Look into my eyes
Originally uploaded by Sunshine follows me.

This last picture is of MDH.

The both of us have grown to love each other more over the past year, and I feel that we have started out our marriage well, giving it a good and strong foundation.

Sure, we've had our disagreements now and again, but we have always managed to talk it out and come to a compromise that makes us both happy. I have learned to be more patient and less grouchy. I think it helps, having a sense of humour. Keeps things in perspective.

I think that more or less summarises 2005 for me. I am really excited about 2006! There's so much more to look forward to!


Have a Happy New Year, everybody!