Lilypie Third Birthday tickers

Saturday, June 17, 2006

There can be only one

Patient: (screaming loudly) You gotta help me, doc, I'm in pain! I'm in terrible pain!
TSCD: Okay, tell me where your pain is.
Patient: (points to head) Here.
TSCD: How does this pain...
Patient: (points to chest) Here. (points to back) Here.
TSCD: Er...wait...
Patient: Here, here, here, here....
TSCD: Wait...stop...
Patient: And here, here, here and here.
TSCD: Wait a minute..
Patient: And also here. And here.
TSCD: Wait, I said...stop..
Patient: And I have shooting pains down here too.
TSCD: I said, STOP!
Patient: pain!
TSCD: You can only have one!
Patient: One? One, what?
TSCD: One place to have pain. Choose one!
Patient: One?
TSCD: Yes. Where is the worst of the pain?
Patient: Everywhere! I have pain everywhere! Everywhere! All the time!
TSCD: NO! You cannot have 'everywhere' pain! You have to choose the worst one!
Patient: But...but...
TSCD: NO! Choose one! Only one!
Patient: small toe.
TSCD: Your small toe.
Patient: Yes, the worst of the pain is in my small toe.
TSCD: What sort of painkillers have you tried?
Patient: None at all.
TSCD: I see.
Patient: Can I have some morphine now?
TSCD: NO. You can have some paracetamol.
Patient: Okay. (takes paracetamol and leaves)
TSCD: (bangs head against wall)
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