Bad Day
1. You. Yes you, will you just sit down and just be quiet for one second while I attend to another patient? Thank you very much. I am only one person and I can only talk to one patient at a time. You will just have to wait your turn, so go back to your bed and sit down.
2. Stop stealing other patient's food.
3. Screaming "I WANT MORPHINE NOW" over and over again will not get you what you want, if it is not what you need. So stop asking. And get back to your bed, please.
4. No, you may not leave your decrepit mother or your energetic toddler here unattended. We are not responsible for visitors. You come back here this instant and take her with you to wherever you are going. The hairdressers, you say? Well, then she can go with you and read the magazines in the lobby. The nurses here are for looking after sick patients, not for babysitting visiting relatives!
5. Get back to your bed, please, I have 3 other patients to see first and they are all more sick than you are. So, please get back to your bed and I will see you when it is your turn.
6. Ms Pharmacist, do not interrupt me when I am talking to a patient and their family. Do not interrupt me when I am discussing a serious issue with them. Do not interrupt me when I am trying to break bad news. Especially do not interrupt me when I'm with a patient, in order to ask me to rewrite drug charts. Dammit, the drug charts can wait, can you not see that I'm busy? There are people crying here! Will you just get out of my sight! I will deal with the drug charts later, now just go away please!
7. GET BACK TO YOUR BED!!!!
8. No, medical staffing goon, I will not carry the gastrology team's on call bleep and the renal team's on call bleep and the cardiology on call bleep and the elderly care on call bleep as well as my own bleep. There is no space on my person to carry five bleeps and there is no anount of money that you can pay me that will make me physically able to be responsible for twenty two wards. So stop asking. Hire a locum doctor, I don't care, leave me alone!
9. AAAaaaargh!!!
10. Somebody help me this patient is trying to claw out my eye! Get her offa me! Get her offa me! That's IT! I'm fricking going home!
2. Stop stealing other patient's food.
3. Screaming "I WANT MORPHINE NOW" over and over again will not get you what you want, if it is not what you need. So stop asking. And get back to your bed, please.
4. No, you may not leave your decrepit mother or your energetic toddler here unattended. We are not responsible for visitors. You come back here this instant and take her with you to wherever you are going. The hairdressers, you say? Well, then she can go with you and read the magazines in the lobby. The nurses here are for looking after sick patients, not for babysitting visiting relatives!
5. Get back to your bed, please, I have 3 other patients to see first and they are all more sick than you are. So, please get back to your bed and I will see you when it is your turn.
6. Ms Pharmacist, do not interrupt me when I am talking to a patient and their family. Do not interrupt me when I am discussing a serious issue with them. Do not interrupt me when I am trying to break bad news. Especially do not interrupt me when I'm with a patient, in order to ask me to rewrite drug charts. Dammit, the drug charts can wait, can you not see that I'm busy? There are people crying here! Will you just get out of my sight! I will deal with the drug charts later, now just go away please!
7. GET BACK TO YOUR BED!!!!
8. No, medical staffing goon, I will not carry the gastrology team's on call bleep and the renal team's on call bleep and the cardiology on call bleep and the elderly care on call bleep as well as my own bleep. There is no space on my person to carry five bleeps and there is no anount of money that you can pay me that will make me physically able to be responsible for twenty two wards. So stop asking. Hire a locum doctor, I don't care, leave me alone!
9. AAAaaaargh!!!
10. Somebody help me this patient is trying to claw out my eye! Get her offa me! Get her offa me! That's IT! I'm fricking going home!
posted by tscd at 12:53 am
2 Comments:
Nice post. Sorry for your bad day, though. I like you writing. I'm going to blogroll you, if that's ok. Hope you're having a good day.
id crossroads: Thanks. I feel better already.
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