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Thursday, October 05, 2006

Behold, the future of medicine

Scenario #1:

Gormless Medical Student: I'd like some X-ray teaching please.
TSCD: Okay. Have you seen any Chest X-rays before?
GMS: Yes.
TSCD: Okay, that's good. (puts up an Xray onto the light box) Do you know what this is?
GMS: No.
TSCD: Well, it's a Chest Xray.
GMS: Okay. Yes.
TSCD: Now, tell me what you can see.
GMS: It is abnormal. There is a big the middle of the Xray.
TSCD: Actually, that's the heart. And it is normal.
GMS: To see the heart? On a Chest Xray?
TSCD:*facepalm* Yes. If there was no heart on the Chest Xray, I would be very worried, and I would maybe prepare some holy water.
GMS: Really? Why?
TSCD: *headwall headwall headwall*


Scenario #2:

Witless Medical Student: I've just clerked a patient in. Can I run the clerking by you?
TSCD: Sure, go ahead.
WMS: Mrs X is a 30 year old lady. She came into hospital today because she was feeling sick.
TSCD: And?
(long pause with some shuffling about)
WMS: And...that's all.
(even longer pause, whilst TSCD picks her jaw off the floor)
TSCD: How long did you spend with the patient?
WMS: One hour.
TSCD: One hour?! And that's all you could get out of her?!!
WMS: We talked about gardening, mostly.
TSCD: *facepalm* *headdesk*


Blogger wahj said...

heh. The optimist in me says "Give em some time. I'm sure they'll turn out alright."

The pessimist shudders in fear.

11:27 am  
Blogger samuraibunny said...

do u watch the simpsons? this reminds me of dr. nick

The kneebone's connected to the... something. The something's connected to the... red thing. The red thing's connected to my wrist watch... Uh oh.

4:29 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

update update!!

10:47 pm  
Blogger tscd said...

wahj: Tell me about it. I try not to shudder in their presence, but it's difficult.

samuraibunny: *doh!*

anonymous: update what?

3:32 am  
Blogger budak said...

if the student is gormless, does that mean the rest of us are gormy?

10:00 am  
Blogger samuraibunny said...

no, it means we're gormed

7:08 pm  
Blogger tscd said...

perhaps it means that we are Gorm-ay. hahaha.

6:18 am  

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